Going Through The Bad and Appreciating The Good

I received a direct mail piece in the mail the other day. It was innocent-looking enough. It was just a black booklet with some information about local businesses in my town. However, when I looked through it, I realized that it was produced by a former employer of mine. Holding this booklet in my hand took me back to that place. That awful place. And it was awful because of "Bob". (Names changed to protect the...well...just so I don't reveal too much).

Bob was an awful boss. Bob had his own way of doing things. He was a control freak. One one hand, Bob would say, "I want you to take on more responsibility and make the decisions without feeling like you need to check with me." On the other hand, whenever I tried to do that, I was told why my decisions were the wrong decisions. So, then I would revert back to running everything past Bob so that he couldn't put the blame on me for things. Then, I would be criticized for not making the decisions myself. It was an awful cycle that just kept spiraling. If I got 999 things out of 1000 done in a day, I would be asked why the one thing wasn't done and told how the other 999 could have been done better. Bob was never happy unless he had total control (even though he would claim to want to let go of control). He always had something to complain about.

The other factor with Bob was that Bob had his wife working for him. Bob's wife was very sweet and very meek. She was kind and gentle and she worked in accounts payable, accounts receivable and payroll. Bob yelled at his wife a lot. He would yell at her in front of the rest of the employees. I felt sorry for Bob's wife. She didn't deserve to be yelled at and I wondered if he treated her that way in front of us, how he treated her behind closed doors.

Last, but not least, the employee entrance to this place had spider's nests and webs all around it. Much to my horror, spiders would be right over the doorway--all the time. Every time I had to put my key in the door and try to push it open (it took some force, because it would stick), the whole doorway would shake and I would be sure that spiders were going to fall on me. I just got chills writing about it. I would spend my day in this place that I hated after walking through a doorway that was covered with things I feared the most. Could it get much worse?

Bob made me feel like a bad employee. He made me question whether or not I was a competent worker. I went from having confidence in my abilities to questioning myself in the less than year's time I worked for him. I realized that it was time to move on when I started to have fantasies about how my life would improve if something bad would happen to him.

When I resigned, such a weight was lifted from me. My life has improved ever since I walked out that door. Now, I have gone from one extreme to the other, because I really love my current job and my current boss is very "hands off". I barely even got trained--and I'm just fine with that.

In a weird way, I am glad that I suffered through Bob and the job from hell. It has made me stronger. It has made me realize that sometimes you have to take matters into your own hands to make your life better.

And somewhere, deep down, I think it makes a great job seem just that much sweeter when you've seen what a bad job (and bad boss) really is.